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by USA on July 16, 2003 at 06:45:02 PDT
Since the introduction of Dr. Seuss to our wonderful lobby the other morning, I felt it was appropriate to share this wonderful poem with all of you. Especially the ladies. =)
Smiles2Send.com - A Dr. Seuss's Poem (A Woman's Version) - Funpages</title<p></head><p><body bgcolor="#000000" ><p><br><p align=center><p><br><p align=center><p><br><p align=center><br><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" border="0" align="center" height="89" width="515"><br><tr><br><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" border="0" align="center" height="60" width="468" bgcolor=black><br><tr><p><br><p align=center><p><table align=center border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="3"><br><tr><br> <td align=center><p><table align=center width=500 height=500 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=5 border=0 bgcolor="#FF0000"><br><tr><br><td align=center><p><div align="center"><br> <center><br> <table width=100% height=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=15 border=0 background="http://addicts.150m.com/satinbg01.jpg"><br><tr><br><td align=center><p><table align=center width=100% height=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=5 border=0 bgcolor="#FF0000"><br><tr><br><td align=center><br> <br><table align=center border="0" width=535 height=500 cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><br><tr><br><td><br><p> </td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><!-- start insert page here //--><p><table border=0 width=100% cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/dswv.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman02.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I'm glad I'm a woman...Yes I am, yes I am.<br><br>I don't live on Budweiser, beer, nuts, and Spam.<br><br>I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.<br><br>I won't drive to Hell before asking directions.<br><br>I act nice at parties; don't act like a clown;<br><br>And I know how to put the damn toilet seat down.<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman04.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman05.gif"><br></td><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#9900FF"><br>I won't grab your boobies;<br><br>I won't pinch your butt.<br><br>My belt is not hidden beneath my beer gut.<br><br>I don't go around re-adjusting my crotch;<br><br>or make sure my headboard bears<br><br>each hard-earned notch.<br><br>I don't belch in public;<br><br>don't scratch my behind.<br><br>I'm a woman, you see...<br><br>I'm just not that kind!<br><br></font><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I'm glad I'm a woman; So glad I could sing...<br><br>and thrilled I'm not covered in shag carpeting.<br><br>Hair won't grow from my ears, or cover my back.<br><br>And when I bend over, you can't see my crack.<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman06.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman01.gif"><br></td><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#9900FF"><br>I'm a woman, alas...and I'm proud, don't you see?<br><br>I'm blessed to have two boobs and squat when I pee.<br><br>I don't live for golf, or shoot basketball.<br><br>I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.<br><br></font><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I don't need male bonding; I don't cruise for chicks...<br><br>I'll never join the "Hair Club", or think with my *ick.<br><br>I'm a woman, by chance and thankful I am!<br><br>I'm so glad I'm a woman; not a man, yes I am!<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman07.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman03.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br></table><br></table><p></td><br></tr><br></table><br> <br></td><br></tr><br></table><p> </center><br></div><p></td><br></tr><br></table><p> </td><br> <br></body><br></html>
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